Yesterday, I drove to work (because it's Tom day - Tom the massage guy.) So, I drove into town (19 miles - at least a gallon and a half of gas plus 1.75 in tolls,) and parked. The car didn't move ALL day until 5:30 when I got into it to drive to the UPS store and to Tom's place behind the 611.
Then, I drove home - it was 7:00, so I thought I'd take the Katy Fwy, since it was SEVEN O'CLOCK and all - it took a fucking hour to get home. Two accidents. And another probably three gallons of gas (all the sitting and idling.)
Today, I'll ride the bus. It picks up on the corner by the door, costs a dollar and drops me off a block up the street from the office. Takes 45 minutes. The car will sit in the garage all day. I will read one of many of my spiritual or self-growth books that are unread on the way in. At any 10 minute interval after 4:00 that I want to go home, I walk two blocks to the stop and in 55 minutes, I'm homo.
For another dollar. And I'll read ANOTHER of my unread list on the way home.
Yet, I'd rather have my car. Amazing how we're conditioned.
Guy is telling me that emotion and other matters are far more involved here than is logic. Well, news flash - I have to FORCE the logic choice. This is why the work with the pattern and other than conscious beliefs are so important - otherwise, your conscious brain doesn't stand a chance.
Many years ago (well, four or five) Jenny Hunter used to tell me to break habits on a lower level - put the other sock on first. Tear apart your morning routine and do it all differently. Clean the kitchen differently. Do your laundry on a different day.
Lord, that woman knew what she was talking about.
What and where can I interrupt the patterned behavior by consciously forcing a different choice, and how will that show up in providing me with other, lesser visible but still controlling behavior patterns that I could force/choose to have be different?
The search re-continues.
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