It has come to this. I had the locks changed; having Joel's phone shut off. I have a friend coming over to help bag up his crap and have it ready for him to pick up. Enough.

I am not going to live with the threat of coming home and finding my things gone, or having someone I don't know in my house, or whatever else is possible. Tonight, I'm going to go through my things that don't get out in the daylight much to see whether anything is missing.

Joel's best friend doesn't think that he would have stolen from me, and he doesn't think that Joel is capable of going crazy and throwing a snit or damaging my property or my person. However.

I tried. I really thought he was someone different. I was wrong.

Ugh at sinus stuff. I slept well last night, but woke up around 5 all groggy. Took some more NyQuil and slept until 9:00 this morning. Ergo, not much has been accomplished yet today.

Yesterday was an environmental day, I guess. I still haven't put up Christmas stuff, but that will come later in the week. I have to clean in here (the den) sometime soon - bleh.

Trying to find dog care for the holidays.

And motivation for today.

I've concluded that I have to ask Joel to leave right away. His behavior is something I can't live with. Better to have him out before things go really badly than after.

Had a lovely long talk with Nancy this morning.

Heard from Jarred yesterday - new phone number, saying that he wanted to get together for lunch or a drink very soon. No answer from him after my reply.

Okay, time to create some productivity here in life.

Sunny, gorgeous Tuesday morning. Started some laundry - today's projects include actual work, cleaning up the apartment, putting out the Christmas stuff, reorganizing my bedroom closet, baking bread, and probably cleaning up the dogs.

Joel is still sleeping - he was very sick yesterday. I'm trying to research online about what ails him, and I get very little information. I think I'll write to Dr. John today and ask him for advice.

Okay - the bread is rising, and I'm about to clean up the screen and bedroom window in my room. Lance is coming over in about a half hour, and I have to get ready for him.

More in a bit!

Rainy Monday. I have been plodding along all day, and now I'm sorting data on a spreadsheet for a report I have to deliver by Wednesday. I started doing a virus scan about 90 minutes ago, and it's still running.

I need to bake some more bread.

Sunday morning - I'm sitting in Larry's den - he's still asleep. It's nine o'clock, and it's very quiet and peaceful here.

Had the STRANGEST dream last night - I was sharing a little, ratty room with Joel - we had twin beds, and he was standing over by his bed. Big, huge snakes were falling out of a hole in the ceiling over his bed, and they were falling on him and on his bed. Maggots were involved, some of them were on him, and the snakes were eating the maggots.

I have NO idea, so don't ask.

Went out on the bar crawl again last night. When we got to the sleaziest bar in creation (the Male Box) this guy we had seen last night was there .. "Steve." He's supposed to be dancing at Larry's party in two weeks. Anyway, he was working us over like a cheap nickel for a while, then he didn't want to have anything to do with us. Bleh. Peelers. We then went out to Cafe Brazil on Central to have a late breakfast, and that was tasty, crowded, and .. bleh. Larry and Gary were eyeballing every cute man in the place - and I just don't care anymore. Is there something wrong with me for that?

Today, we're putting up the two Christmas trees, and then I guess I'll drive home and put up my own Christmas stuff. While at Garden Ridge yesterday, I bought some silk flower cleaner (yay!) and a display case for the one model car that I have which has no display case (yay!) - both together for under ten bucks. Do I keep the model cars out when I put out the Christmas stuff? I don't remember.

Donny and Al were out again last night, and I assiduously ignored them both. They'll, of course, be at the party. Larry is expecting me to tend bar .. why does this feel to me just like the foundations for what happened five years ago? I'm bringing up a guy that will be new meat, I'll be behind the bar, so he'll be out in the crowd socializing, he's not inclined to stick with me, since we don't have anything "going." Larry is even talking about having the same dancer at the party - the one who shoved me out of bed five years ago! Um.

Did some reading up on crystal meth yesterday - I don't know much more from the US Government's website than I did before I looked. Weird. I actually wrote to Travis last night and asked him what could be done organically to help someone with that issue. No answer yet, of course, if I ever get one. Maybe it would just be best to contact Dr. Dan and ask him.

I think Larry's up, so I'm going to log off and hang out with him.