Hump day - an interesting morning already.
My cable modem is doing its level best to interfere with my ability to do anything today. In the last 20 minutes, it's
recycled on and off at least eight times - meaning that my internet connection goes on, goes off, goes on, goes off -
Spent a long long time last night thinking about my big ol' trigger issue (the one that I said I was taking a vacation from in
August) and last night, after some meditation and reflection came to understand the link between the apparent trigger issue
and my sister - everything suddenly made sense. I felt a ton better, after being fully resolved last night to not go to my
dad's birthday party at her house in New York next week.
I got up this morning (still feeling a ton better,) had an email from my aunt telling me I had probably just mis-understood
my sister - still feeling all better - and thought I'd write my sister a simple email explaining to her that we needed to
establish a new paradigm - still feeling better!
And then, I realized, anything I said to her would be completely invalidated by her saying it was my own fault and
interpretation, and that she's done or said nothing and I needed to get over it. While medicated, preferably.
And that was the end of that.
So, I've written to her telling her that I'm expecting to not attend (the reasoning being that if I'm going to be punished by
the family for being an unreasonable bastard, better to not have to attend and take the beating in person,) and that talking
to her about any of it was pointless and that she should not call me anymore.
Yup. (visualizes cruise across the Atlantic on the Queen Mary 2 with Chuck en tuxedo) I can focus on the things I want
and how I want to feel, and I can chose to not engage in old patterns with people who aren't going to change their
behavior and expectations just because I've been working on mine.
Spent all that time last night going through financial claims and writing up a report. Sent that out last night around 10:30 -
and had a call this morning around 8:00. Seems I knocked that one out of the park. Looks like I've continued to polish
my halo there.
Cable modem's been offline now for a half hour. And, I'm on the phone waiting to talk to the cable company - seems
that they're busy today. "All agents are busy assisting other customers."
Ah! An agent! And a snippy one, at that.
After this phone call, I need to start getting ready to have a day. It's looking like I'm going to have to cancel with Rosita so I can be available for this client all afternoon.
2 comments:
Okay, the Queen Mary. Both ways? Not bad. This is funny because I just wrote an English friend about coming over on the Queen Mary. She just proceeded to tell me about her terrible experiences cruising from England and California to Mexico. Isn't it just terrbily British to throw a damper on a dream! But I love her anyway...not that I would ever really go on the Queen Mary. I think I would be bored to tears. Give me the air, baby. Quicker, nicer and get to see more at the destination. But anywhere you go with Chuck would be awesome and fun. Do take good care of him. I like him a lot.
Hey, you did really good on this one. Sometimes we just have to divorce our families and go find new ones.
And it isn't my modem that is going in and out but my wireless connection...at least that is what I think it is. Bah humbug! Irritating as all get out. I sympathize big time.
Post a Comment