Happy Monday morning to you all!

I am beginning my first full week at R&Rs office - gradually bringing things in from the car, which has a full-ish trunk of office related stuff. I have to spend my week working on business plans, and proposals for bid opportunities.

The weekend was fun, but different. I taught all day Saturday, then had Mikey over to reconfigure my new computer. The apartment is a wreck. But, we got the new computer totally up and running, which is great. I have Mitch coming over tomorrow evening, so I have to clean up my place pretty darned fast, and I have David (from Oklahoma) coming sometime soon, and David (the student) coming over for tutoring Wednesday night.

The pressure is on. And I start my new Science of Mind class tonight.

No safari this week. Maybe no safari next week either. Interesting.

Got moved out of the old office, and MJV moved EVERYTHING (including the carpeting) out yesterday.

Nothing grand to write today - more will follow!

Black diamond eyes
A smile that lights
the dark corners of your soul
Tall, lean, long, graceful

Universal obsession

Old men, young men, pool hustlers
lawyers, blue collar, blue blood

All line up out of hope

A nod brings warmth
A smile, relief
A wink lifts the spirits

Every night a seething throng
waits their turn
for any attention that may
come their way

Everyone made to feel special

But only one
Really is.

Copyright 2004, Douglas J. Hord

Friday evening, and the first time I've skipped the gay.com-a coffee event in weeks. I didn't leave the office until 6:00, and by the time I got home, got the dogs out and so on, it was time to go over there and I just flat didn't feel like it.

The weekend is upon me, and my weekends have been so much more fun than in years. Friday nights have become social, albiet with the gay.com girls, and then Saturday mornings with Mikey and the Ben Breakfast at Barnaby's. Tomorrow at 11:45, I'm picking up Judy at the airport, and we're going to knock around until it's time for Safari. I have to transcribe some poetry tomorrow morning, and I have to work on my "lesson" for church on Sunday. I've already planned it out, so I just have to make some outline notes and be prepared. And dig up some quotes.

This weekend's challenging question is - do I give Jarred a gift? Two gifts? I have started writing a poem for him .. which I referred to two nights ago. I picked up this really cool little foilo to transcribe some poetry into (it's all in the archived blog, folks) and I've decided to call my nascent collection of poems about men "Deep Smit." Which amuses me. Jarred's poem is going to be titled "Universal Obsession."

Worked with Rick today for six hours. Got some things done. We set up a merge document for the full service recruiting side that we'll start sending out every two weeks. That's a cool thing. Did a bunch of projections on our a la carte side, and that's starting to look even more promising than before.

My house is no where near my normal standards of "clean." With Judy coming in, I was torn between cleaning it up for her, or waiting until her whirlwind leaves and cleaning then.

I have to get my car cleaned up tomorrow. Yeek! It's just disgusting. I'm going to see about the state inspection and an oil change, too.

Well, that's the update. I'll write more about how my sermon on graduation goes.

Howdy! Time for a big ol' blog blob. It's nearly been a month, and there's a lot going on. How about we start with headlines?

THE DIVO GETS THE CALL!

R&R CONVINCE THE DIVO TO CHANGE CAREERS!

THE DIVO ONCE AGAIN WRITES POETRY BECAUSE OF SOME MAN HE CAN'T HAVE!

How was that for a teaser?

Okay, so I haven't looked at Jarred's picture (except for the one that I made the wallpaper on my Sprint phone, which I can't really avoid all that much) in two days. Who's Jarred, you ask? Why .. he's the bartender at this nasty, trashy, sleazy dump of a bar that I've been going to for more than a year because he flirts mercilessly with me. And because my friend Mikey can try to pick up street hustler boys, which makes him happy. I'm happy, Mikey's happy, everyone's happy! Last Saturday, Mikey took his digicam to the bar and snapped a picture of Jarred - which he emailed me. Now, it's EVERYWHERE. We're going back "on Safari" this Saturday. I know it's just pointless, meaningless flirtation, but there's a LINE at the bar of men jockeying for Jarred's attention, and he pays most of what he doles out to me. Several other people have noticed this, so it's not just a random fantasy of MINE. Although, I'm quite skilled at that, it seems. Jarred's birthday was a week ago this past Monday, and I'm waffling as to whether to acknowledge how much gladness he brings me with some sort of gift. Well, heck, there's a gift that's already in a box, but I'm having second thoughts. I'm thinking of hand writing out all of my poetry (about boys) in a nice sort of a folio thing, and writing one for/about him and giving him THAT.

Now, what was our next topic? Yes, I'm leaving the loan shark business and moving back into HR Recruiting. I've already started splitting my days between the one and the other. The afternoons - they're great! There are people to work with, people to work with things on, and things to be created and done and thought up and things. I love it! It's so much better than pushing paper. I'm not really a salesman anyway, so my abilities to bring in lending business were more because I'm a great networker and problem solver that people trust and rely on than going out and hauling in new leads. I should be fully transitioned in June. Which means, no more walking to work. No more sleeping until 9:00. No more part-time work. Hm. I'm enjoying the change, though.

And, yes, I have received the call. Which call, you ask? Why, the one that tells me what the heck it is I'm supposed to be doing on this silly rock, of course. I've been wandering around for the last nearly 30 years wondering just where I fit in. Most of the places I've tried to fit in were places that I was told I should pursue, or thought I wanted to pursue. I never really LOVED anything passionately, and I'm just not ever going to put myself deeply into something that I don't really love to do. Professional singer? Tried it, no. Lawyer? Tried it, no. Mortgage broker? Nope. BORING and way too stressful. I produced musicals and variety shows. Nice, but didn't keep me up at night, excited and thinking about what I should do with it. I've taught college for 17 years, and that's been okay. I'm tired of teaching the same material over and over, though. However, our minister at church (which I have attended sporadically over the last few years, but which classes I have soaked up as fast as they could offer them) has taken a six month leave, starting the day that I accepted a term on the board of directors. Sneaky, wasn't that? So, the other [two] board members and I agreed to take on the running of the church while she was gone. And, the first Sunday that she was gone, I was on deck. I had already agreed to "give the talk," before she revealed her plans, but I found that I was responsible for the WHOLE shooting match. And, I wasn't in a class (that she taught) that I could regurgitate back to those assembled.

WOW. I was awake most of the night, mentally preparing. Nervous? No. When you've roller skated into a restaurant dressed in a bright red fairy costume, tutu and wings, getting in front of people doesn't exactly ring your chime. However, I was so turned on by trying to create a linear POINT to everything I had in mind, and making it vibrant and real and interesting ..

Got up Sunday morning (way before my normal 9:00 roll out) and was at church (25 miles away) at 9:30. It was BRILLIANT. Then, just last Sunday, I did Ver. 2.01. Spoke about "Victim Consciousness." Again, up all night (well, after two and a half hours of Jarred flirting with me, and then mentally structuring my "talk," I got about three hours of sleep) and when I got back home around 1:00, I was too jazzed to nap. This Sunday, I'm speaking about "Graduating to the Next Phase of Your Life," and I already have everything planned out. I just have to look up some quotes that go along with what I have in mind. My long time friends have been astonished at how turned on I am after I leave the church, and my overall mood as skyrocketed.

So, I'm going to be a minister. It's going to take five years, and $25,000.00. I'll have another degree (this one a Master's of Divinity) and right about that time, our minister will be ready to retire ..

I'm jazzed. I finally feel like I know what I'm here for. It combines everything that I love doing - performing, organizing, writing, thinking/creating, and teaching. It's an amorphous task - cooking up something new to say EACH WEEK that's relevant, interesting, linear and a contribution to people's lives.

The response of the members of our [very little] church has been very positive. VERY positive. They LOVE me and what I say. I'm so happy about it!

Well, that's the Divo update. Thanks for having a look.

Well, it's almost May. I managed to skip March, and not write anything.

Lance just bought a car - after nearly six months without one. I hope this makes him feel much better. It took lots of creative positive energy on my part - he was feeling VERY nervous and negative about the whole experience. It took them about 25 minutes to come back and say that they had accepted his price and down payment, and that the monthly was something he could afford. Very nice.

I just haven't felt at ALL like working. UHCL classes start up again in two weeks - five Saturdays of getting up and schlepping my way to Clear Lake before 8:45 in the morning. Which means I'll not be able to breakfast at Barnaby's and ogle the really cute waiter we've discovered.

Haven't been hunting for Jarred the South African bartender in about three weeks. I think that Mikey has promised me that we'll go this weekend. I have to do some serious apartment cleaning this weekend, too. I'm way behind.

I've "come out of the closet" with my desire to become a minister - I've started the course work, and I have approximately five years to go. It's another Master's Degree, and I'll be about 51 when I'm all done.

The loan business has been DEAD. I've done three loans this YEAR, I normally need to do three a month. Tax season sucked [for me] because I make so little money doing taxes. We haven't been out marketing the loan business for months - we're going to re-start that tomorrow.

So, I've been hiding out. A fugitive. I've had Judy at the apartment, followed by Michael for nearly ten days - pandemonium. The stress has been impressive.

Still no one to write poetry for. Jaecub is sleeping his way through gay.com, and I kep hearing about it. He doesn't speak to me anymore.

Ah, nearly a week gone by. This day started out all sunny and gorgeous, but the clouds have rolled in. It's probably because I must either work on some unsavory tax returns or work data mining some court reviews to do marketing. Why or why do I not have a slave to do this work for me? (grins)

Well, Jaecub stood me up. On Valentine's Day. Which means - bleh. I was quite unhappy. I saw him the other night - had to drive out to get him and bring him back. It was unsatisfactory, seemingly for both of us, since he's no longer responding on instant messenger. I think that one has run its course.

However, the whole experience (along with some others) has me looking at why I've been stood up SO much in my life. Of course, that brings one right back to one's self. So, I'm working on that layer of "the onion" now. Bleh.

Had some interesting conversations yesterday about the toxicity of Aspartame and the addictive qualities of Diet Coke. Yikes!

Well this afternoon must be about creating new business. I'll be focusing on that, which involves actual WORK.

Met a wonderful guy yesterday on gay.com - wow. Our conversation is awesome, and we'll see where things go.

Cold!

I'm spending a quiet day at the office, talking to prospective tax clients. Had a grad student from Buenos Aires come in asking about filing taxes on an F1 student visa. He has eight total friends who need their returns done.

I'm also surfing through old floppy diskettes that I discovered last night when looking for the phone manual for my friend Mikey. I found a few dozen old marketing flyers and documents that I did up when I was working in the mortgage business prior to 2000, and my diskette of internet "favorites" - awesome!

Tonight, I'm having the first real date with Jaecub. He's coming over, spending the night and we'll have quiet time together. I'll be making spaghetti, as I'm broke until payday on Monday. Unless my teaching check comes in today, and I can go cash it somewhere. It really doesn't matter - I'm good for taking care of him until tomorrow.

Have a big loan application tomorrow - and it seems like I may have a home for it. One lender called me back late last night and said that they wouldn't pass it up until they had the loan details.

Other than that, I should be working on a new douglashord.com website, and I haven't done a thing about it. Perhaps I'll spend the next hour doing that.

A sunny day, finally!

I'm sitting here, waiting for the errant tax client to stroll through the door this Saturday afternoon. I have some marketing work that I could do, and I can tidy up the office. That will take fewer than 30 minutes, so .. what to do until then?

I actually told someone that he should do the Forum last night. I don't know what came over me. I had another friend that I have been THINKING of recommending the Forum to, but ..

RC, the man that I like so much, is moving out of his home with his "other half" next weekend, and into his own apartment. He says that the relationship is over, but he and that guy have done the on again, off again thing several times over the last few years, so I'm not holding my breath.

And I had a "date" set tonight with "Eduardo," who is now out of communication. So, I'm not holding my breath on that one.

I spent some time actually talking to JW in Tulsa. He's just lost. Lost, frustrated and defeated. He's the one I told should do the Forum. I like talking to him.

Should have my internet connectivity re-established at home tomorrow. WHOO HOO. Using my Sprint PCS phone - taking a page from my friend James' experience. Cuts my monthly obligations by $140, and hopefully will lead to re-organizing the guest room. I spent hours clearing out the drawers and such last weekend, and now, it's time to move the furniture around. I'm going to get the computer out of the corner where it lives now, and get the dresser out of the closet where it's lived for the last three years. I'll have all the wood furniture lined up against one wall, though, unless I come up with some brilliant new furniture arrangement for the room. Not having to accomodate the computer desk and bicycle will make a difference, though.

Larry is coming to visit next week, which is great - I haven't seen him in a while.

And Matthew from Austin sent me some pictures of himself today. Interesting. I wonder what's on his mind?

Hm. I think I was in a bad mood the last time I blogged. Since it's been two months, I guess that also means I haven't had this on my mind, either. I've taken up the notion of coming back here a time or two, but haven't.

An update:

"Self Mastery" is completed. It was a great course. Yvette and I are looking for more courses to take at the Creative Life church in Spring [TX.] We both are interested in becoming religious science practitioners.

My blood sugar is pissing me off. My friend Lisa's pregnancy got to a point where she isn't allowed to go walking any more, and I've stopped exercising. Ah, well. I'll get back to it.

I have been greatly enjoying working with Lance. He's awesome. We're starting to have success with our marketing.

I'm still engaged in conversation with RC, for whom I wrote the poetry back around Nov. 5. He's "thinking" about moving into his own place. He's a mess. I still like him. I haven't seen him for nearly six weeks, and he's stood me up a time or two during that period. Why would I keep talking to him? I don't know. Just when I have decided to cut him off, he does something that suggests he truly is interested. Still, I'm not making any more offers to him.

I've been talking to this very nice lad from Tulsa - very handsome, very erudite. Not the best at communication, but it's all good.

Boris the waiter just stopped by - his visit was interrupted by business. I did tell him that Lance and I wanted to take him out for a few beers, which he was agreeable to.

Tax season is upon me, and my circle of friends coming to me for tax preparation is increasing. Hopefully, it and my circle of referring realtors will continue to expand.

No new poetry, not since RC stood me up in November.

I'll be better about keeping up these posts.

Okay, so it's been three months. Maybe there's just been nothing worth writing about.

Work is work. Lance [my new working partner] is awesome, but it's all just conceptual still. There's no business. Michael [the owner of the business] would still rather drink beer at Hooter's than talk to me about developing anything there, and until that changes, it's all just mental and emotional masturbation.

I'm taking a class through church again - "Self Mastery" this time. I'm beginning to think that this, like Landmark Education, like everything is more mental masturbation. It gives one a veneer of control, of self-direction, but it's all just bullshit. I don't know [tonight] if it's worth finishing the course.

Stood up again tonight, ver. 3.01 with this guy. Tonight was a work excuse. I don't care if he's the ONE that God has intended for me from the beginning of time, I'll never speak to him again. What a shithead. I wrote TWO poems about that boy, too.

Let's reproduce them here, shall we?

First, was this one - entitled "Jaecub" - my first indulgence in haiku

Sparks fly - new love meets
The thoughts of perfect forever
Fear and hope collide

Will lovers survive
Baggage - new uncertainties
Risk unbearable

Know what is vital
Love does happen at first sight
Strength brings perfection

Then, there was this one - entitled "the empty wine glass"

My apartment sits
just as quietly lit
as any other evening

In a neat row
in the bar's soft glow
stand four red wine glasses

Bejeweled
Confident
Bewitching

The soft whine of machines
A calm background achieves
Yet my home is far too silent

The one I think of most
is on another coast
and my wine glass must stand empty

The frustrating heights
Seven more nights
Before I fill my glass

And learn what fate has for me

I"ll tell you what fate had in store for me - another dry fuck after a promise of happiness.

I'm walking six miles a day, and have radically cut back on my food intake - can't seem to drop weight.

Is reality a fucking joke or what?

All of this on top of health issues with NO health insurance, and no way that it's coming into my life unless I win the lotto soon.

Yeah, it's a joke. It's a joke in which you are repeatedly given the impression that things are going to work out for you, and then the rug is jerked out from under you at the last second.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

Fire! Flame! Conflagration!

Quick! Someone pass me the ACME anvil!

Payday, and supporting bois who should still be living with mommy

Mercifully, I had a little paycheck today. My larger commission check will issue on Tuesday, but that's pretty much already committed. I'm still waiting for my paycheck from UH-CL, which isn't yet overdue, but is past the normal time that I would have gotten it.

Spent my tiny paycheck on gas, car insurance and groceries. And Robert. I didn't give him much money, only about ten bucks, but he did demand fealty. He's off on the bus to apply for a job at Katz' [Katz' never closes!] then, later, I think he's going to Mingalone, a place he's waited tables before, to see about a job and an old paycheck there.

Robert being the boy from Arkansas. Who could give my friend E [from Vancouver] a BIG run for his money drinking vodka. Robert went through 1.75 litres of vodka between Saturday afternoon and Monday afternoon [48 hours.] When he wasn't hoovering up the vodka, he was sleeping it off. Very enrolling.

Eric still drifts in and out; I hardly see him [or my computer.] He's supposed to start paying rent a week from tomorrow, although there is a fair chance he'll move in with Walter, another gay.comicon. Walter doesn't have a bed for him, though, so he may stay here a while longer.

Agreed [in principal] with Michael today to work for him two days a week in Seabrook doing legal work. He pays me $25/hour for that, but I'm going to insist on 8 hour days if I'm going to be traveling down there. He has enough legal work to make it happen; he just needs to let me do [all] of it, and review and then sign things.

I feel rather like Wile E. Coyote - I keep getting banged with the big ACME hammer, but I keep going back for more.

Buffy, Ver 4.01

Finished watching Buffy season four last night - boy, it was great! I missed all this entertainment for seven years, deciding in advance that it wasn't worthwhile, and not knowing that it was something awesome.

Along the same vein, today, the boy from Arkansas is supposed to be arriving by Amtrak. Of course, the world's most gullible human gave him the train ticket. I could tell where things were going as I recited the reservation code to him - his friend [who was taking him part-way to Little Rock to get the train] showed up, and he got off the phone without establishing that I'd pick him up, that he'd look for me, etc. My feeling was confirmed as the day wound on, when he didn't call me. Today, he's on the train [right now, the bus connector] to Houston, and I'm wondering - should I go to the train station to pick him up? What is his plan? Is this another youngster who's just scamming what they can?

Been working this afternoon on amended tax returns for a client who walked in. Have a woman who mailed me a new loan application, but I'm not sure about whether I can do anything for her.

My [very young] friend Steve is coming to see the show tonight. I think that Lynette [my friend who directed me in this show the first time] may be coming tonight as well.

Another Monday

Had dinner with Dr. John last night. Very pleasant evening; lots of great conversation. I skipped the theater's annual awards show (which was late six weeks.) The bitter part of my heart won out; the show/event was a flop (as compared to what I had built it into.)

I was just exhausted yesterday - this show takes a lot out of me.

Chris was very complimentary of me Saturday night, but told me that some people at the theater still think I'm there to cause trouble. Very disheartening.

Found a gorgeous 1971 Impy online today -

Also found [after years of searching] a triple black 1973 4-door Imperial. I just wrote and asked for pictures.

Tonight, I'm going to work at de-dogging my apartment - it's just coated in dog dander and hair.

Talked to Dr. John last night at length about how he transformed his body. It sounds interesting. I may have to do something like that. I've decided to spend this week on an apple fast - try to clear out my system some. It's been weeks since I've had any alcohol at all; now I have to see about doing something like he did for myself.

I just wonder if I'm really cut out for sales/marketing. Hmm. That's what is occupying my thoughts today.

28 days after ..

My friend Kurtis took pity on me today and took me out to dinner and to see a movie [which is identified in the title to this blog.] He's just the nicest man; don't confuse him with Curtis, who's got different issues.

What a movie!

Anyway, it's about time to walk the mutts and think about getting some sleep, so I'll just note that I got the insurance crisis fixed, and am on to the next dilemma - the loan investor who doesn't answer the phone.

Cheers!

Some days, it just seems that you'd be better off serving coffee at Starbucks

So, today, I've been running around trying to get insurance solved on this file that should be funding [paying me money] today. The title company tells me one thing, the insurance agent another, and the lender something else entirely. And everyone's telling me that they can't do it that way.

Thus, I'm frustrated and have a headache.

I'm starting to work on getting my law license reinstated, and running into nine year old roadblocks there as well. I'll have to go down to the courthouse, probably on Wednesday, to work on that some more.

In betwixt and between phone calls about this insurance issue, I get a phone call from the Upshur Country [TX] jail. Um .. that's where PJ is.

So, I answered.

Guess what! He wants money. (rolls eyes) He's been in jail for three months, but didn't want to tell me what it was for. He's coming back to Houston sometime soon.

Oh, my.

Okay, so I've been busy with the show and everything ...

The show opened, and it's going very well. I was starting to hear some compliments on my performance; I still feel [to a considerable degree] like a total outsider at the theater that I helped run for five years. No rehearsals this week - so no theater commitment until Friday night for the new performance.

Not starting the new dream job tomorrow morning - if you didn't hear, they [Ameriquest] decided to close the Houston office rather than move into their new suite. Very strange. No word from BofA or Countrywide on their level of interest, if any.

I did buy some new work clothes to go with the dream job, and for interviewing purposes. I feel a whole lot better about myself [and more motivated to work] when I get a little cleaned up and dressed up.

Working on midnight again, and the putative room mate is not yet home. He goes out about four nights a week. I call him "putative" room mate, because he's staying here for free, and I'm having flashbacks of ALL the people I've let hang out in my "extra" bedroom(s) over the years.

Nat came over today, and we hung out watching movies. I need to go grocery shopping in the WORST way.

Two days to payday.

Picked up the cell phone from Curtis, and got him to take nearly all of his clothing a week ago. Waiting to borrow Buffy Season Four from my friend James.

That's about all the news that's news. More in the morning.

Mid-day update ..

Well, my divorce client's loan approval was on the fax this morning when I came in - very nice! I have some legal files to work on, but I'm so DAMNED unmotivated.

I feel like going home and having a nap, then baking some bread. I should stay here on the off chance that someone calls. I sit. I wait.

I wrote a new poem, I'll post it when I get home. I think I'm also going to pull my computer apart and find out why the printer won't work. Oh, yes - and the filing.

My friend Dave just sent me a link to an airliner parody website. Now, I have something to do!

A month? It's been a month?

Well, I guess ..

A fine Friday morning here; I have a new loan to work on when I get into the office, and I have some other work to crank out today. I have to manage my work flow, or I'll run out. If I run out, I don't even like going over to the office.

I have a totally free weekend - amazing! Rehearsal for tonight was cancelled, the Pride parade is tomorrow evening, but other than that, I have totally got nothing scheduled. I do want to go to this new loft complex over by the ballpark called Alexan lofts, and check out an apartment that I may want to move into around Christmas time. But, I so love my apartment now - it's just the right layout and size for me, and its location is primo.

My new job starts in just three weeks. Well, two weeks from Monday. I'm nervous about telling Michael that I'm leaving, and trying to figure out a way to break it to him that he doesn't go ballistic.

I have one and only one project for the weekend - to catch up on my filing here at home. I have everything in orderly piles next to the filing cabinet, and now, it remains for me to create the file folders, type up the labels, and put everything away.

I had a dream this morning about my "friend" Jenny, with whom I have strife from time to time. In my dream, I called her on the phone and she was still sullen and crappy - and I told her how the cow ate the cabbage. It was kind of a fun dream, actually.

Still wondering how I'm going to pay rent next week, since I haven't had any loan closings since early June. I have some money coming in from different sources, but will it all add up? Talking to this guy about rooming with me for a few months while my income gets ramped up - I emailed him last night, but haven't heard from him just yet.

Other than that, there isn't much to tell. I'm wondering why my car payment hasn't been deducted from my checking account just yet. I think I've lost a few pounds. Hm. That's about it.

I'll have more to say in the morning, I hope - thanks for waiting.

Divo ...

Okay, so I haven't had that much to say lately.

Another successful day at trying to move loans into closing. Things are going a little better than they looked on Friday morning, and hopefully two loans will close this week.

Since this is how I make a living, we think this is a very good thing.

Michael was in today - having the same conversation with yet another person who has no interest in being in the mortgage business. He seems to think that if he finds a bunch of people in real estate, insurance, stocks, etc. that he can talk into being loan officers, they'll magically produce business (that I will have to manage for free) and he will get richer.

I think he's not paying attention.

Anyway, my young friend David stopped by today, and I helped him with his resume. While working with him, I was extolling the virtues of employment search on Starbucks' website, and found two fine positions for my own self. One in San Francisco, and one in Seattle. Then, I read an email from the Mortgage Training Institute, with whom I just took a class, and they are recruiting for instructors. Hello, Mary! I'm there. I filled out my third online application for the day.

Other than that, I didn't get a whole lot accomplished. Got a file stacked and out for delivery. Did some quotes for potential new business. That was about it.

Talked to Jeffrey today about the Golden Girls thing in Austin. Boy, did I make the right call in not going. It was trailer park heaven with old cars. I had fun with Larry and his crew in Dallas.

Rehearsal tonight. Came home to find that Jackie had again busted out of the kitchen and peed in the living room. I haven't had the heart to check the bedroom yet.

She's now leashed to the laundry room door, where she will stay except when she's outside. I just had the carpeting shampooed, and she's now made two big wet spots.

Lovely.

I'm thinking about going dogless, frankly.

Other than that, nothing much is new. I got my car inspected today. I still love "Matrix Reloaded" regardless.

Why does nearly everybody miss the primary point of the whole movie?

And why does Rick think it's appropriate to attack me all the time now? He's such a horse's ass most of the time. I'm thinking about refraining from visiting there anymore.

Like starting this Sunday.

Well, keep your fingers crossed for me and the mortgage institute gig. That would be awesome!