four years to look forward to

So, I've mostly tolerated the rantings of the "conservatives" that I know - probably has lead to the depression and anxiety that has ripped my life apart. I have tried to engage in rational discussion, third party fact checking, and so on, but the "conservatives" that I know, even the mostly sane ones, are so caught up in the daily download of conservative pornography from the RNC (as has only recently been documented here and on other non-MSM sites.)

HOW could so many different people take umbrage on the SAME day with the SAME idea using the SAME phrases?

Well, because it's all scripted, that's how.

After becoming de-homed back at the end of September, I drove out to San Francisco and stayed with a friend from college for a month. Living in San Francisco was quite an experience in freedom. People on the peninsula just don't judge each other at ALL. One is taken for how one behaves, not how one looks, where one lives and so on.

The late election eve experience for a homosexual in San Francisco was a staggering change. We, no - I - was singled out by the electorate and told EVERYONE IN THIS STATE MATTERS EXCEPT YOU.

An atmosphere I'd been quietly tolerating back in Texas (from the Indian Tejas - friendly. Fat chance.) for twenty-seven years. I could feel in the "air" that we were singled out from the herd. Not accepted. Not allowed. Wrong.

And, I was ANGRY.

Okay, I've been angry since 1980 when Jimmy Carter lost to Ronald Reagan, but NOW I WAS REALLY ANGRY. I came back to Texas (drive friendly!) to get my life back together and get the FRACK out of here.

That's when I came to realize the depth of the racism and elitism here. It's not elitism like what Obama was accused of, or the elitism that is denegrated in the press. Not a lot of arugula here in Houston.

It's the elitism that allows a 33 year old who doesn't have a pot to piss in and can't hold a job for more than three months, has never paid his child support, doesn't pay his taxes and has no education past high school to lord it over the blacks, the Mexicans, the poor, anyone who isn't WHITE. That's the key thing that I think we kossacks and progressives are not fully understanding. Race is the bottom of all of this.

I stopped tolerating race baiting the day after the election.

A lady friend of mine took me to dinner and was snarling about the black churches improperly proselytizing which brought Obama the election.

This was not new. This was a "friend" who, in front of ALL of my friends at a birthday party told me she was still surprised, given how intelligent I am, that I'd be a liberal.

For the last ten years, I'd have pointed out politely that there aren't enough black people in the country to push an election, and there are only a handful of cities where the black population can carry the day in a vote.

This time, I said "this is utterly inappropriate and racist and I won't tolerate it. If you'd like, I'll take you home right now and we can skip the opera."

She didn't like it, but she shut up.

I read every day how we Kossacks and progressives are expecting the Demos to roll over and play dead for the Republicans shouting in their unified meme. I expect it too.

But, if we accept this - as I accepted my friend's overt racism for YEARS, who's at fault? WE have the majority?

Why should we not prosecute war crimes and offenses against our domestic laws?

Why should we not prosecute the illegal politicization of our civil departments and agencies?

Why should we not bring about the IMMEDIATE dissolution of the unregulated trading structures that provided a place for a handful of thousands of hyper-wealthy to trade up our fuel, food and financial prices?

When the Demos start to roll over, why don't we say to them "I won't tolerate this, it's inappropriate. Would you like me to take you home now, or would you like to go to the opera?"

Final note, one of my best friends from high school reconnected with me on Facebook a few months back. He and I hadn't talked in 30 years. He could, if he chose, sit over there behind his computer and look at pictures, and think whatever thoughts bring him pleasure.

I for my own part don't reach out and smack old friends around on Facebook or elsewhere. I do post articles, notes, and such on MY profile that I find interesting. Hey, it's MY Facebook page! He posts all kinds of nasty crap and I don't go over there to his sandbox to see what cat turds he's burying in the sand.

But, when I post something - I get the nearly immediate little red pop-up "***** **** has posted a comment on your item."

Just guess how many times it's flattering or polite? C'mon, just guess.

Okay, fine.

Tonight, I posted a couple of things. One, a thought about how it is people think they can get their laundry clean with crudded up machines. One, a link to Paul Krugman's article about how to get the economy started again. And, one a quote from Kos today on how a party committed to government being incompetent is incapable of running a competent government.

Over there, in his sandbox (if I were truly snarky I'd use the term litter box here, but..) he decides to post "Office of the President Elect" HaHaHa find that in the Constitution."

A.) I'm tired of the dog whistles.
B.) I'm sick of being part of the progressive roll over and play dead movement
C.) I was friends with him THIRTY TWO YEARS ago. Like I need someone giving me crap.

Here's the progression of what came next:

Me: "Uh, you don't get to talk about anything not being in the Constitution, since Richard and George just made up eight years of shyte that wasn't EVER in the constitution. Sit back and take your medicine."

Him: "Others misdeeds are no excuse for your own"

Me: "I didn't create the title that you now object to. And, truly, after all of the shredding of the Constitution, international law, domestic law and just plain common sense that has been supported by .. um .. well, people I know, I just am not listening to any superficial complaining about someone adopting an "uppity" title for their office. Hey, ... guess what? He IS the president elect. And, he has an OFFICE! It's an office where he's conducting the business of being the president elect! There are even structures in place from prior to his being born to PAY FOR IT.

If you have a complaint, at least make it a good one. Repeating today's RNC talking points that were broadcast by Fox and the AM dial isn't information, nor is it discernment.

Oh, and hey - congrats on spreading today's latest slice on the racial dog whistle. Obama's an uppity nigra."

Now, you know he had some comeback, right?

I saw the little red flag and .. I didn't even want to go look. So, I didn't. I started this diary instead.

But, when I went back to Facebook to collect my quotes above, I saw his reply.

Him: "Whoa slap me down with a vengeance"

That's right, sucker.

Paraphrasing Sean Penn from "Milk"

On the Statue of Liberty, it says "Give me your poor, your hungry, your huddled masses yearning to be free." and in the Declaration of Independence, it says "All Men Are Created Equal." You can't rip that out of the Declaration of Independence and you can't take it off the base of the Statue of Liberty. That's what it is to be an American!

I say, ENOUGH. When they dog whistle, they must be called out. People are people. Everyone deserves a chance. No poor person brought our economy to its knees, and no person of color put us into Iraq, nor gave us a military budget equal to the gross national products of 3/4 of the world's nations. No illegal immigrant destroyed the watershed, or polluted the air, or outsourced all of our foundational employment to other, cheaper countries.

If the elected try to play roll over, I say - Let's take 'em straight home. We can find another date to the opera.

A milestone achieved

I don't post much on Daily Kos. I read it relentlessly - "it" being a collection of individual thoughts and posts, opinions with some facts thrown in. I've been a member for a couple of years, first so that I could post comments. I don't do that very often. I've posted only a few times. Had a few comments.

This morning, I read a recommended article from the LA Times about a guy who used to be a writer for the Wall Street Journal, and has been now homeless for three years. He lives in the back of his Toyota pick up. I wrote a post in response to that, and plunked it down.

Daily Kos gets tens of thousands of posts each day - called "Diaries." They are unedited. If someone violates the site's TOS (that's internetic for "Terms of Service) they get deleted and blocked, but people can say pretty much what they want as long as they're not suggesting violence toward someone.

I don't read all of these diaries.

Editors, who are I believe volunteers, review the tens of thousands of diaries, and advance them for everyone to see on the front page. In addition, a handful of regular diarists post straight to the front page all day. Each night, some ten to fifteen diaries are recommended for everyone to read. This feature is called "Open Thread and Diary Rescue." Some of these diaries are just emotional stories, some are well researched tomes, some are ill researched rants.

My diary today was recommended for everyone to read. I'm both honored and embarrassed.

Warm, Dry, Full

Cross posted from Daily Kos

Homelessness takes many, many shapes - and most homeless are not living under a bridge, but are living on a friend's sofa, or in a den or guest room.

Les Gapay writes of having lived from the back of his pickup in today's Pundit wrapup. Even that homelessness is mostly invisible, because he's not out begging for coins and sleeping in a doorway.

Homelessness means that you cannot any longer provide a home for yourself and your family. Being warm and dry and fed doesn't equate to being "homed." Having a home of your own gives you the ability to say how things will go, how clean it will be kept, how it will be managed, when it will be quiet and who will be coming over.

Homeless means that you're dependent on someone else's expectations, upon someone else's schedule and way of doing things. If you can't adjust ALL of your psyche to meet them all the way on their side of the equation, you are about to be homeless without the warm/dry/fed part.

Homeless also carries with it an internal stigma. That you couldn't keep it up - you couldn't carry the day and manage it. That you may never be able to do it again.

Homelessness also means forcible separation from one's "stuff." Mine, for instance, is in two different places, 40 miles apart. Not only do I not have any place for it to go, elements of it have been planing away for months - things that once meant a great deal to me are too difficult to keep moving or are broken or just taken. My surround sound system now lives elsewhere forever. My furniture is scattering quickly as friends mention they've always liked this piece or that piece and could they have it? Buy it?

Never does it bring a fraction of what it would cost to replace. My future home, if there should be one, could now be contained in a one bedroom apartment, maybe even a studio. Even knowing that, there is no sense of accomplishment, only an effort to battle a sense of loss.

The only relief homelessness provides is freedom from the crushing slavery to paying housing, utilities, cleaning products, everything that you once did to make and keep your place as your own. My very high paying consulting career ended weeks after 9/11, but the hand writing was on the wall when the incoming Bush administration simply canceled all of the social/education/community development funds that our division was working with. Since then, I've been trying to find a place for myself, and maintaining a space for myself has been a pitched battle each month. Finally, when Hurricane Ike made its appearance, my entire weakened self-employment network came to an end. Twelve days later, I was living on the good wishes of good friends, and wondering when, if ever, I would be "homed" again.It's so very easy for one to think of someone like me, talented, enormous skills, and think "well, you're choosing to do this." At some metaphysical level, that's probably true.

However, when your day is consumed with trying to keep your household going, or trying to figure out where you can put everything when you cannot keep it going, and then trying to help out the people with whom you're staying by doing their house cleaning and chores - there is little time left for actual work. Bouncing around from friend's sofa to friend's sofa leaves little time for planning and execution of your recovery - you barely get your shaving tackle situated and it's time to move on to the next friendly place for a few days. Everyone in your life wants to hear from you "how did this happen? What are you going to do next?" Hours each day of concern - hours that eat up whatever time you do have to make something for yourself.

Hours of concern that can only be interpreted by you as an expression of dismay and disappointment that you didn't work hard enough or make better decisions. Concern that you just don't want to hear anymore, because none of it is helpful or new.

There are no resources for homeless people, if you have a little income and a car of your own. If I were HIV + or if I were a battered woman, there would be assistance. Our society sees fit to help no one; those who worship Ann's Rant "Atlas Shrugged" have done their best to eliminate any social net that they can adequately vilify through daily talking points.So, no bridge for me. No back seat of my car - yet. I'm luckier than most. But, I'm as homeless as the guy who just asked you for a little change on the sidewalk. I'm glad and thankful that I have what I do still have, though.

But, don't be surprised or call me unpatriotic when I say I'm not too proud of this Country of ours just now. That opinion has been a long time coming, and there is only a glimmer of hope for the future.