Vancouver bound and gagged

I began to think I had the only red car in the reddest of all of the states.

I don't mean dark red, or maroon, or claret, or merlot - I mean "push me down and do me" red. Blood red. Screaming for attention red. Red like my car, my phone (that matches the paint on my car, thank you very much. Like the bags things are packed in that ride in the car. Like Jackie the dog.)

I drove straight up US 287 from Ennis (south of Dallas) through Waxahachie, Wichita Falls (failing to stop in Anarene for lunch), Amarillo, Dumas, and then through endless, nameless towns in the Oklahoma panhandle, and through southeastern Colorado until I connected with the interstate system near Denver.

From there, I took I-25 to Cheyenne, then west on I-80 through all of Wyoming, into Utah, skipped Salt Lake City, clipped the edge of Ogden, and headed for the Oregon border.

Oregon started off very high, and almost as curvy as Utah. Oregon is amazing and beautiful. It was in eastern Oregon that I saw the first red car on the road since leaving Texas.

As I was trying to negotiate sharp curves and transiting from 6% uphill grades to 6% downhill grades in the rain, I had someone in a bright red Pontiac G6 chase up my bumper moments after developing the thought "I haven't seen a red car in three days."

They were at least polite - no tailgating, and they moved along quickly.

Only a few minutes later, a young woman in a bright red Chevy Cobalt came running up behind me. I was passing a truck, something that one does a lot of in the mountains, and had the cruise control set for the state speed limit of 65.

Apparently, I was causing her some difficulty, because she ran right up behind my rear bumper such that I couldn't see her headlights. Once I finished passing the truck, I moved into the right lane. She gunned her little motor and went past me.

Her car was equipped with a "fart pipe". That's one of those large diameter exhaust pipes that one usually sees on more ethnically connected and older Japanese cars, which makes a loud noise akin to a very long fart.

I still haven't seen very many red cars.

I've seen some amazing things, though. An early 80's Plymouth Reliant that still runs. A Datsun (By Nissan) B210 (second generation) that isn't completely rusted out. A Chevy Celebrity wagon that still runs.

Lots of older cars in use here in the Pacific Northwest.

Some notes:

* Wyoming has some of the best pavement I've ever driven on. Oklahoma, hands down, the worst.

* Construction zones on Interstate freeways should be much better marked than they are.

* Wyoming saves money on signage and uses it on freeways - meaning, their signs SUCK, and there aren't enough of them.

* Oregon has the best speed limit signs. HUGE, with ENORMOUS letters "65". No uncertainty.

* Utah didn't post a speed limit sign for nearly seven miles into the state.

* Texas excels in small towns with lower speed limits without any prior warning.

* Oklahoma is the gold medal standard in such speed traps. Fortunately, they have no people living in the panhandle, therefore no police officers to nab anyone.

* Colorado's rustic visual imagery seems engineered and a facade. Wyoming's is because that's how they live.

* Oregon smells great

* Mountain roads, twisty curves, steady rain, falling temperatures nearing freezing, heavy traffic, summer performance tires, at night on roads you've never driven is a great recipe for paying close attention through adrenaline.

* Canada customs officers are mostly movie-star handsome.

* US customs officers look like country sheriff charactures, with consistent personalities

* Motel 6 quality is widely varied from property to property. The towels are all the same, as is the decor.

* A dog, laying on the floor of the car for three days, produces an astonishing amount of particulate trash and a noisome odor.

* How did I live so long without XM radio? The sheer reliability and clarity of non-stop signal for the stations which you wish to listen to is a blessing.

I haven't really seen all that much of Washington state. Seattle (which I passed through at night and in the rain) looks awesome. Washington roads are beautifully built, well signed, clear, and much like riding a wooden roller coaster.